Britney Spears is somehow meeting men
November 20, 2008
Britney Spears, despite being legally insane, went out on a date last night with a mystery man at Sur in Los Angeles. This has to be a kick in the birth canal for all the sane women out there who know that children aren’t an end table for your cellphone yet still can’t find a man. Ladies, I’m here for you - provided you don’t try to change me and make me wear pants. Can’t you just love me for who I’m? *sniff* I’m going to my mother’s.
Jessica Simpson should go easy on the collagen
November 19, 2008
To whoever convinced Jessica Simpson all men want to secretly bang Daisy Duck, hardy har har, asshole. I kid. High five! Do Heidi Montag next.
Britney Spears to light tree at Rockefeller Center
November 18, 2008
Live in New York City? Now would be a good time to leave. Britney Spears is scheduled to light the tree at Rockefeller Center therefore ushering in Armageddon and ruining Christmas for every girl and each boy, according to OK! Magazine:
Sources close to the pop superstar confirm to OK! that on Dec. 3, the day after she turns 27 and her new album, Circus, hits record stores, Britney will be in the Big Apple for the 76th annual tree-lighting extravaganza. What’s still unclear is whether or not she’ll be performing at the ceremony, or just hanging out with host Al Roker for the NBC broadcast of the event.
Lindsay Lohan attacked by animal rights activisits
November 17, 2008
Lindsay Lohan was pelted with flour on her way into a Paris nightclub last night. She’s been on several Worst Dressed Lists for animal rights group for wearing fur coats. Lindsay was wearing one last night (above) at the time of the pelting. PETA Europe issued the following statement (via E! On the internet):
“Lindsay Lohan might be able to ignore images of bloody animals skinned alive for their pelts, but we hope a dash of flour will help her rise to the occasion and forsake fur once and for all,” PETA Europe spokesman Robbie LeBlanc stated.
Jennifer Aniston has possibly snapped
November 16, 2008
Jennifer Aniston is typically a private person. But in the past 24 hours, she’s showed up on Oprah to talk about the infamous Vogue interview and, even more surprising, she granted herself to be photographed with John Mayer last night - in public. Judging by the look on her face, I’d state she’s lost it. And all according to Brad Pitt’s plan. You know somewhere he’s looking at these while twirling his mustache: “Ha! Angie, look. We totally made her show up in public with that dude. Man, what a goob. - Christ, are you birthing again? But Smallville’s on…” Video after the jump.
Jessica Simpson shunned from Country Music Awards
November 15, 2008
Jessica Simpson pulled off the impossible last night: She was shunned from the 42nd Annual Country Music Awards, according to TMZ:
In a last ditch effort to save her career, the “Dukes of Hazzard” star released a country album earlier this year — so it would have made sense to make an appearance at last night’s show. Unfortunately, the Carrie Underwood-hosted CMAs had no time to have Tony Romo’s current girlfriend perform, present or sit in the bleachers, since they’d already filled their ranks with tried and true country artists like … Hugh Jackman, Nicole Kidman, Reese Witherspoon and Lil Wayne!
Salma Hayek has the world’s luckiest infant
November 14, 2008
It can be tragic when a promising entertainer falls prey to the clutches of addiction. This absolutely isn’t one of those instances. Fox News reports:
Salma Hayek might soon need rehabilitation for an addiction. The actress, who gave birth to daughter Valentina in 2007, says she can’t stop breastfeeding. She said: “I’m like an alcoholic. It is like, I don’t care if I cry, I don’t care if I am fat, I’m just going to do it for one more week, one more month, and then when I see how much good it is doing her and I can’t stop.” The 42-year-old also said breastfeeding does not helps mothers shed post-pregnancy weight. She told Style magazine: “The myth that says you lose all this weight when you breastfeed! That’s so not true! It’s like, please, will everyone stop telling me I look really well.”
Kate Beckinsale kind of working out
November 13, 2008
For no reason except that she’s hot, here are some shots of Kate Beckinsale working out. Or, uh, walking around a Brentwood neighborhood and talking on her cell phone. Which is sort of like working out because, well, you’re moving. Kind of. Plus you get to wear working out clothes. Physicians agree, this level of physical activity ranks right up there with watching Television or going down a slide.
Amy Winehouse redefines ’sexy’
November 12, 2008
Amy Winehouse held court with the paparazzi outside her house this morning and, aw shit, he’s flatlined. I knew it. Excuse me while I snap my penis out of cardiac arrest: “Live, dammit! LIVE! No, not like this…. Not like this…. Fight, damn you! Jessica Simpson is just one straight-to-DVD bomb away from doing porn. DON’T YOU DIE ON ME! *sniff* You complete me.”
UPDATE: Britney Spears’ son rushed to hospital
November 11, 2008
Britney Spears’ two-year-old son Jayden (above) was rushed to a Mississippi ER yesterday after reportedly suffering a seizure. Britney had just arrived in Louisiana on Friday to celebrate the holiday with her family marking the first time she was granted to take the boys out of the say since Kevin Federline gained primary custody. That lasted 24 hours. The Daily Mail reports:
Jayden James was raced to the emergency ward after lapsing into a ‘vague and unresponsive’ say.
The toddler fell ill yesterday afternoon at the family home in Kentwood, Louisiana. The entire Spears clan made the 25-mile dash to Southwest Mississippi Regional Medical Centre, Mississippi.
Physicians were unable to pinpoint the problem straight away and kept the toddler in for overnight observation. Distraught Britney, 26, refused to leave his side and asked for a bed next to him in the ward.
Her ex-husband, rapper Kevin Federline, is now believed to be making plans to jet out of Los Angeles to be at Jayden’s bedside.
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